Cheap Bastard heads to Zimbabwe on greatest golf adventure ever

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The Cheap Bastard is in a pickle. A really big pickle (obviously). After years of giving of myself, management now wants more. "Where are the great deals you promised," they asked. "Why don't you post more," they scream. "If we have to chase you out of t… more »

Pig out on a succulent Hawaii golf package

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The Cheap Bastard loves Hawaii. What's not to love? Beautiful, exotic women, glorious golf opportunities, fabulous beaches - it's a true paradise. And let El Cheapo let you in on a secret: If you get a shovel and dig anywhere on any one of the Hawaiian I… more »

Cheap Bastard advice: 1. Buy Bob Hope golf stuff at auction, 2, Use that stuff to pummel Wolfrum

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The Cheap Bastard despises William K. Wolfrum with the intensity of a thousand flame-broiled cheeseburgers. Wolfrum – a whiney, Marxist/Communist/Socialist/Terrorist/Stupidist that doesn't even have the courage to live in the United States – recently… more »

Golf Vancouver, B.C., because Canada is the nicest part of the U.S.

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The Cheap Bastard doesn't spend much time up north. Especially not after that seal clubbing incident. But sometimes even yours truly needs to get out of his comfort zone - and let me tell you it a true Zone of Comfort - and see what's happening with our… more »

Save the USA: Book a golf vacation to Mexico and toss out an illegal immigrant on the way

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Folks, your pal the Cheap Bastard has come up with a fool-proof plan on how to get you playing golf at some of the world's most beautiful golf courses for less, and save the country from the scourge of illegal immigration, as well. Here's what you do,… more »

Some Florida Valentine's Day golf package ideas from a Cheap Bastard

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Appearances aside, the Cheap Bastard is the romantic type. El Bastardo treats his woman like a queen, lavishing her with gifts, tender words, and the occasional romantic golf package for two to a Florida resort. So it really makes you wonder why Los C… more »

Get your golf travel deals from and send William Shatner back to making movies in Esperanto

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Back when El Cheapo here was a Teenage Bastard, he remembers the endless rumors of how you could go to government auctions and buy a Jeep for $1. It sounded fantastic, of course, but then you noticed that you never met anyone who had gotten a Jeep like t… more »

Joe Beck's free golf video tips kick ass, plain and simple

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The Cheap Bastard likes things that are inexpensive and that should go without saying. And his Royal Cheapness would never steer you wrong or give bad advice. Don't for an instant confuse me with my brother Rat. Because here's the thing, El Bastardo m… more »

Free golf balls for a year and "World's Funniest Golf Balls" makes terrible writing here more bearable

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The Cheap Bastard is constantly amazed at just how low the bar has dropped for golf writers. As if guys like Chris Baldwin, Tim McDonald and Brandon Tucker aren't bad enough, there's Bill Wolfrum, one of those wimpy liberal types who gets offended at his… more »

Free Skies means Australia is 2008 golf destination of the year for U.S. travelers

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The Cheap Bastard loves Australia. From the moment you arrive, hot, scantily clad women like Elle McPherson and Anna Rawson busy themselves giving you massages, while Russell Crowe and Paul Hogan fistfight to determine who will hand-feed you another shri… more »

Golf Girl the sexiest golf blogger on the planet - buy anything she tells you to

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The Cheap Bastard is in love. Yes, yours truly has finally found a woman deserving of his own unique brand of love. Horrible, sweaty, nearly illegal love. That's because El Bastardo has finally found the woman of his dreams - Patricia Hannigan, author of… more »

Celebrate Hugo Chavez's big loss at a winning Burbank golf course

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Hey Folks, happy Monday, or, as your pal Cheap Bastard likes to call it, "The Day Hugo Chavez Got Spanked in Venezuela" Day. Yes, our least favorite commie-pinko-scum-dictator got told by his people that they didn't want a dictator. Or if they want a dic… more »

The Myrtle Beach Insider will find you great golf deals and savory Buffalo wings

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The Cheap Bastard is good pals with Randy Inder, who writes the Myrtle Beach Insider blog over at We make an unbeatable team. With his good looks, charm and intelligence, and my ability to eat copious amounts of Buffalo wings, we are… more »

They fought the law and the law won - now score great deals on golf gear!

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The Cheap Bastard is a law-abiding citizen. But really only in the scientific sense. Meaning you'd never catch El Cheapo violating, say, the law of gravity. Or the Zeroth law of thermodynamics, which states "If two thermodynamic systems are each in therm… more »

Arizona Golf: Save big money on green fees now that the heat is on

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The Cheap Bastard is a carbon-based life form. But a highly flammable one. You see, where most people get pigment, yours truly got a mixture of rocket fuel and propane. Now, surprisingly, this makes my skin incredibly soft and supple. But sadly, my body… more »
Wickenburg Golf Packages
Dates: January 3, 2018 - September 30, 2018
Where else can you play a round of golf, ride a horse, enjoy a massage and experience the traditions of the Southwest in one place in one day?
Price range: $199