The Cheap Bastard likes heading to places with warmer climates this time of year, because going there in the dead of summer would create a Bastard Flash Fry, what, with my delicate complexion, and all. So I’m heading to the Inland Empire region of California, smack dab in the middle of San Bernardino County, the biggest geographical county in these United States. Veering off I-215, I’ll be making a stop in San Bernardino, right near Devore, to play a round at Shandin Hills Golf Club. They have decent rates to begin with: $24 to walk, $35 to ride, but I saw they ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard loves Pittsburgh. First of all, the Steelers play there. Second, it’s a town that survived losing its blue-collar economy and re-invented itself as a white-collar town. And finally, the Steelers play there. So when Chris Balding, I mean, Chris Baldwin, spent some time 30 miles north of Pittsburgh in beautiful Butler County, I was understandably concerned that he’d bring both myself and my beloved Steelers some bad mojo. On the contrary, however. Somehow Baldwin managed to slip through a time zone and find some of the cheapest golf you can find. Baldwin actually gloated about this in his blog ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard follows other golf bloggers closely. Unfortunately, Heather McMichael said it was too closely and now I can’t come within 500 feet of her. However, I did see Golf Blogger make reference to a deal on low-priced clubs, so I figured I’d take a look. What I found was a blowout clearance sale of many of this year’s top models at the Golf Warehouse. Being that the Cheap Bastard is often in trouble on the course and off, I immediately took a fancy to a TaylorMade Rescue Mid Wood for just $130. I’ve been keeping my eye on this ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard has dabbled in transgenderism, but it never really took. This is unfortunate, because yesterday I found a deal that’s strictly for the ladies. For the fourth year running, the Chateau Elan Resort ((678) 425-0900) in Braselton, Georgia, will have a deal from mid-November to mid-march in which women play for free. That’s right, free, which is by far my favorite word in the English language. Chateau Elan has three separate courses – the Chateau, Legends and Woodlands. As An added plus, you may be able to get some golf instruction from Geoff Sarazan, grandson of the great Gene ... full post »

When your life is as busy as the Cheap Bastard’s, sometimes you just need to get away from it all. So that’s what I’ll be doing this weekend. It’s time to stop thinking about alimony, palimony, drunk in public charges and pending lawsuits for a while and head off to Hilton Head, S.C. Being that I’m the type of guy that likes packages (no, not those kind of packages), I went over to Hilton Head Golf Travel to see what I could find, and lo and behold, I found the perfect deal. For $319, I get three rounds of golf – at Golden ... full post »

Just when you think you’re out, they pull you back in! At least that appears to be the case here in Naples, Fla. The Cheap Bastard, crammed to the eyeballs with affordable eats, was set to make his move up North when he heard about an unbelievable deal down here. In November, they hold the Franklin Templeton Shootout in Naples. For $100, you can get yourself a “A Taste of WCI” ticket package. What does it include? One weekly grounds ticket for the tourney, plus play on 10 WCI courses in South Florida (you’ll only pay for a cart) and eligibility ... full post »

When the Cheap Bastard’s long-awaited book “The American Dream: Get Fat for Less” finally makes its ways to book stores, you can be sure there will be a chapter devoted to Naples, Fla. You see, my friends, there’s something to be said for cities with a large retirement population: A lot of people wear their belts around their chest. OK, there’s two things that can be said, because the deals are everywhere. In Naples, the deals are all about food. Being that the Cheap Bastard watches his waistline (it recently hit the floor), cheap meals are always a priority. Right now in ... full post »

Ah, Indiana, home of Larry Bird, Larry Bird’s relatives and people who have met Larry Bird. It’s truly one of the Top-50 states in the U.S. And let me tell you, they are moving up the ranks with me with how they approach golf. The county of Marion has set prices for city-owned courses for the remainder of the golf season and right now it’s officially too cheap to miss. At the championship courses of Eagle Creek Golf Course and Coffin Golf Course, you can get on for $25 or less any day of the week. At other 18-hole courses nearby, the ... full post »

Bored with just being known as a place where old people used to go to watch Shecky Greene and Pat Boone, the Poconos are looking to golf to help expand its tourism base. Not a bad idea, as the Poconos have some of the nation’s oldest, most revered golf courses. The good news for you, my cheap golfing friends, is that many of the courses up there in the Pennsylvanian back woods are offering some great deals. The Evergreen Golf Club is offering a deal for weekend foursomes. If you schedule your round for before 7:30 a.m. or after 3 p.m., you ... full post »

Our friends over at MSN are running a story about the most expensive golfing items you can buy. Luckily, the Cheap Bastard has several defibrillators stashed around the house or he’d never of been able to get through it. But anyway, as I find challenges everywhere, I decided I’d take a couple of their examples, and find something a wee bit cheaper MSN: MaxFli BlackMAX ball ($50 a dozen). These balls will fly 250 yards and straight even if you swing and miss entirely. Ok, I just made that up. However, like the Cheap Bastard, the BlackMAX balls have a large Neodymium ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard is timeless and ageless, which is great news for him. But the fact that you, my devoted reader, are aging rapidly is not such bad news, either. You see, over the weekend I was down in Orlando watching The Villages Retirement Home set the new world record for the largest golf-cart parade. They managed to get more than 3,000 or those buggers zipping down the road at about .02 MPH. Witnesses say that the left-hand turn signal was flashing in 2,978 of those carts, but that can’t be confirmed. “We’re geezers,” Mike Wilmot, one of the cart drivers said. ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard loves to hear from his many admirers, provided they don’t call collect. That being said, a reader going by the name New Golfer (why would anyone use a fake name on the Internet?) wrote in with a couple ideas for saving money. “Two great ways to save on clubs. One: Make friends with the staff at your local golf course. I’m told they get at least one lost club each day. If no one claims them, after a while they sell them - cheap. I recently saw a very nice wedge for sale for $5. Two: Thrift stores and ... full post »

The Cheap Bastard likes to shop. Which, ironically, goes against everything he stands for. You see, my friends, the Cheap Bastard is an enigma, don’t even try to figure him out. So today I went down to one of the 17 Wal-Marts in town, said hello to the friendly, elderly greeter, and bought myself a golf-club travel case for just $30. A perfect gift for a traveling golfer, provided you aren’t one of those types of people who believe Wal-Mart is plotting total world domination. Because the Cheap Bastard is the type of person that could care less who dominated the world, ... full post »