The Cheap Bastard’s got balls. Nasty, dirty, dirty balls. They’re out in the trunk of my Vega. I keep them there so they won’t infect anyone else’s.

Yes, your pal Cheap just can’t pass up picking up a golf ball and sticking it in his bag no matter how old, decrepit and cut up it is. As an aside, I feel the exact same way when it comes to prostitutes. Just a little fun fact.

But the truth is, it’s time for a change for El Cheapo. This year, I’ll be stocking up on fresh golf balls. I’m willing to replace all my lousy golf balls for some newer ones. I’m exhausted of the times I hit the driver on the sweet spot and watching the ball travel 50 feet and then explode. I mean, that doesn’t even make sense.

So I’m heading over to UsedGolfBallDeals.com to find me some deals. After years of spending no money on golf balls by playing mush balls, I’m willing to spend a little money, but not too much. And I immediately found a deal that felt right for my frigid wallet.

For just $19.99, I can get a deal on 50 pack of AA Titleist DT-Solos. They say it’s a great for winter play, and who am I to argue. I once tied rubber bands around a rock and then dipped the whole thing in glue. They actually worked Ok, but if you lost it, it took another two months of newspaper deliveries to get enough rubber bands to make another one.

But no more of that, with UsedGolfBallDeals.com, I believe this year I’m ready to make the step up and use quality used balls. They have tons of other used ball choices over there, as well. Maybe next year your Cheapness will step up and buy new balls. Oh, who am I kidding, that’ll never happen.

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