The Cheap Bastard loves Hawaii. What’s not to love? Beautiful, exotic women, glorious golf opportunities, fabulous beaches - it’s a true paradise. And let El Cheapo let you in on a secret: If you get a shovel and dig anywhere on any one of the Hawaiian Islands, you know what comes up? Succulent, molten pig.

So yours truly was excited to see Larry Olmsted at USA Today (the guy who has some weird Bro-mance with WorldGolf.com’s Brandon Tucker), write about a deal to Kauai through the Kauai Visitors Bureau:

The Kauai Visitors Bureau has gotten the island’s best six golf clubs together, with 117 holes between them, and created six golf-centric “activity packages,” each combining golf with other things. Each package costs a flat rate of $175, which means up to $150 in savings on some courses. The packages include:

Poipu Bay: One round of golf, a $50 gift certificate to the onsite Hyatt ANARA Spa, and one sleeve of Titleist ProV1 golf balls.

Kauai Lagoons Golf Club: One round of golf and choice of two Sunday Champagne Brunches or two prime rib and crab buffet dinners at the onsite Kauai Marriott Resort.

Princeville Golf Club #1: One round of golf on the 27-hole Makai course, plus admission to the The Princeville Hotel’s Poolside Luau.

Princeville Golf Club #2: One round of golf at Prince, one $75 gift certificate for Princeville Resort Spa.

Puakea Golf Course: One round of, plus admission for two to the Sheraton Poipu Sunset Luau.

Kiahuna Golf Club: One round of golf, one 55-minute massage.

To find out more, head over to the Kauai Visitors Bureau. Or if you’re looking for another succulent Hawaiian golf package, check out the packages WorldGolf.com has to offer.

El Cheapo is ready for some Hawaiian luau action, let me tell you. I’m already packed even. Got my Speedo, got my shovel and got my sunscreen. Though truth be told, despite my Latin heritage, yours truly has incredibly sensitive light skin. So I don’t even bother with sunscreen anymore. I just have someone give me a good blast from a fire extinguisher.

See y’all in Kauai.