Who suddenly decided walking your dog while playing golf is a fine idea?
Or more accurately, letting your dog run the fairways as you launch wayward missiles into the trees. Everyone’s seen these dog walking golfers. They’re inevitably in a cart themselves while their dog sprints every which way in crazy pursuit. And it seems like you’re seeing more and more of this special annoying breed.
The owners. Not the canines.
I ran into a twosome with three dogs in tow on a pretty nice course in Palm Springs. What’s next? Babies on golf courses?
Of course, that will never happen. Not because of common sense though. Because babies are a less pampered group than dogs in much of Western Civilization.
You didn’t have to watch the fawning live coverage of Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro’s post surgery press conference to recognize that animal people have completely lost their minds. Sure, it was tragic to see Barbaro shatter his leg running in a sport designed solely for so-called “animal lovers” to wager on. But did we really need to see his veterinarian answering questions with more self-confident smugness than Kobe Bryant?
I know I’m in danger of sounding like TravelGolf.com’s resident Howard Dean
Liberal William K. Wolfrum here, but while Barbaro was being fussed over, there were crippled veterans being ignored and homeless folks stepped over.
Which brings us back to dogs on golf courses. Only self-indulgent pet owners - and there rapidly appears to be no other kind - would even have the gall to attempt something like this. I have nothing against dogs. I had a great basset hound named Eric as a kid. I didn’t even mind the co-worker who kept professionally shot pictures of his labradoodle - that’s right he took his dog to one of those mall shops where most people take their kids (needless to say he wasn’t married) - on his desk.
But no one needs to see your four-legged friend on the fairways. It’s a golf course, not a park. If you’re too lazy to walk your dog around the block, hire some kid. Playing golf and walking your dog are mutually exclusive activities. It’s not equivalent to listening to the iPod and IMing.
Forget the fact that most dog owners don’t know how to clean up after their friends (that’s one unplayable lie we don’t need). It usually slows everybody down and takes away from course ambience.
Ruff no.

Seriously, do a little research before writing your column.