Defending U.S. Women's Open champ Cristie Kerr a psycho, but that's not all bad

EDINA, Minn. (June 29, 2008) - You’ve probably dated a woman like Cristie Kerr at some point in your life (and have the war stories to tell about it). Or you probably complain to your girlfriends about the woman at work who’s like Cristie Kerr.

Watching Kerr play in the U.S. Women’s Open, one can only come to one conclusion: Kerr’s a little batty. And you can probably drop the little.

She holds an almost running monologue with her clubs, her ball, the grass, the trees. And yes, a lot of golfers talk to the ball as it’s in the air, but not like Kerr. She’s screaming at hers almost every shot, giving it the most detailed instructions this side of a Martha Stewart cooking show.

Then, there is Kerr’s shot routine - which would put the slowest cup-adjusting, batting-glove-flexing, stepping-out-of-the-box, kicking-the-dirt major league baseball player to shame. In an LPGA world where everyone plays slow, Kerr still sticks out - to the Ben Crane extreme.

I watched her take 10 minutes over her second shot on the ninth hole late Friday night. Ten minutes on one shot with the sun going down and other groups that had been rain delayed fidgeting back on the tee and Lorena Ochoa not so happily waiting by the green. Frankly, it’s painful to endure a Kerr round.

She is golf’s version of the Human Rain Delay. Which no doubt has Annika Sorenstam - one of the few little nonsense players out here - thrilled to be paired up with Kerr in today’s final round.

A lot of casual golf fans only know Kerr as the woman who used to be fat, became skinny and then started winning - including last year’s Women’s Open at Pine Needles. That only provides the slightest clue into Kerr’s psycho nature though.

When she moved within two shots of the lead in the second round, she gave one of the shortest interviews you’ll see on a Tour where 99 percent of the players go out of their way to be press friendly. After Kerr excused herself, one veteran golf writer cracked, “That was Mickelsonesque.”

Then, like Mickelson at an Open, Kerr quickly fell off the leaderboard afterwards. She shot a 75 on Saturday and is one under for the Open, eight shots back of the lead now held by Inbee Park, heading into her seventh hole of today’s final round.

There’s good news for the LPGA’s psycho though.

She’d be Monk’s favorite golfer. And probably TravelGolf.com hanger-on RonMon’s too.