What golf gear do you want from Santa for Christmas?
Predictably, every Christmas I get bombarded with golf presents.
I’m not complaining, but friends and family wisely take the easy way out. They know a box of Titleist Pro-V1s will be much needed after a season of losing golf balls around the globe. I usually get my yearly supply of golf gloves and tees, too. They make nice inexpensive stocking stuffers.
But here’s what I really want. And I suspect a lot of golfers will agree with me here.
1, A pair of arm warmers. I saw a media comrade (shout-out to Stuart Hall) wearing these a couple of years ago on a chilly morning down south. I’ve never seen them in a golf store or pro shop but I want a pair. They’re made of the same type of stretchy, skin-hugging material as Under Armour gear, but they slide on and off much easier than having to go to the bathroom and peel off that extra under garment. And for the record, they’re not nerdy like leg warmers.
2, I want to continue to collect great golf books. Not lame books on swing technique or cute little stories, but grand editions that detail the history of golf and its great courses and tournaments. I’d love to get the The Rolex World’s Top 1000 Golf Courses or the new “GOLF, The Captain’s Edition.” Both retail between $1,000-$2,000. I’m not expecting these anytime soon.
3, More yellow golf balls. I felt like I played some of my best golf earlier this summer when I was hitting yellow balls by Srixon and Bridgestone. It didn’t really matter the version of either. For some reason, I could see the ball better and felt more comfortable over it. I got ridiculed several times for using them. One playing partner even remarked why would “a player of my stature” play a yellow golf ball? Clearly he didn’t know me well because: A, I’m not all that important in this little industry of ours, and B, my sorry game eventually lost every single one of those little golden treasures.
4, A golf trip my boss will never send me on. I’m lucky that my boss kindly e-mails me once in a while and says, ‘Want to go to Hawaii?’ (which I am next month). But even I have dreams of teeing it up in faraway lands. I’ve still never been to Scotland to sample the cuisine. Australia and South Africa remain pipe dreams.
5, That one magic club to fill a hole in my bag. I’ve found several of them over the past couple years, but I’m not quite there yet. An Adams hybrid has changed my outlook out of the rough. I can now hit greens from the hairy stuff 190 yards away. My driver gets funny looks from strangers - I might be the only golf writer in the world playing a square-headed Nike MachSpeed - but it remains fairly consistent. My latest addition was a beauty, a Miura wedge, that I love. I thought Rocketballz 3- and 5-woods would really change my game. They’ve been inconsistent, but they’re still longer than any fairway woods ever.
6, It’s sad I’m taking inspiration from a wacky Canadian, but I desperately need a gaudy belt buckle like Hal Quinn. Instead of a ‘Q’ that Hal sports with pride, I want a ‘J’. I’m trying to become more fashionable on the course. It seems to help the Euros win Ryder Cups, so maybe it will help me break 80.
I hope my wife is reading this, but sadly, she doesn’t like golf. I guess I’ll have to wait another year to see if my Christmas dreams come true.
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