Playing through, and other discomforts of golf

So am I the only person who hates playing through?

I feel enough pressure standing over a ball without adding the fact that four pairs of eyes are on me, watching my every move, groaning if I put one into a bunker, wondering to themselves why, oh why, did they just let a woman play through?

I reserve all my worst shots for those moments when everyone?s holding things up on my account. And maybe I?m not the only one.

Today I played in a foursome, and we kindly let two guys play through us. One of the guys hit his shot well off the green, into a small grove of trees. His second attempt hit one of those trees and ended up even further from the hole than his tee shot.

At that point, if I?d been him, I would?ve succumbed to the shame, and just picked up my ball. But he pressed on. His third shot finally dribbled close to the green. He put it on the green with his fourth shot, then three-putted for a 7. On a par 3. With an audience. I felt his pain.

Sometimes when I?m playing alone, if I get the wave, instead of playing through I?ll just keep driving and mark a little X on my card. Who needs the added stress, you know? A group will wave me through, and I?ll say ?oh, no, wouldn?t want to hold you fellas up. Don?t worry about me!? and scoot on to the next hole. The problem with that approach is that after the round is finished, sometimes I discover that I?ve only played 13 holes.

When I first started playing golf, I had a desperate urge to explain myself any time I played through. ?I?m a beginner! I?m new to the game!? Now, five years later, I still feel that urge to explain myself: ?I?m not always this bad, I?m just nervous!?

Think they believe me?