Until today, I had endeavored mightily to avoid writing anything about an already over-hyped 2008 Summer Olympics”, but my dwindling patience have been finally ripped asunder. And I must beg, of all that is holy (and even the unholy programmers at NBC):

Please, PLEASE – Enough with the beach volleyball already! How many freaking matches of this completely contrived abomination of an Olympic “sport” do we really need to see?!?

Every night I come home (or morning when I take my daughter to the orthodontist, or afternoon writing articles at sports bars), hoping to see some true Olympic sport like Greco-Roman wrestling or shooting or judo or weight-lifting or badminton – hell, any event that is not merely a variation of a real, already well-represented sport.

But no, there, again, on my TV are gritty men and women in skimpy swimwear flopping around in the sand, looking for all the world like jocks on spring break, and absolutely nothing like Olympians.

I realize the U.S. is dominant in this “sport,” but give it a rest already. How about some variety, oh ye sports geniuses who brought us the XFL?

And, for that matter, how about a real sport? Seriously, this is the final year for baseball and softball – two sports played throughout Central America, the Caribbean, and Asia (not the mention the U.S. and Canada) – but it’s deemed not international enough to be included in the games next time around.

Instead, we have beach volleyball. Really? A crude variation of a true sport but somehow different simply because of the number of players and the surface upon which it’s played?

Well, then, let’s include street hockey, stickball, and indoor soccer.

Better yet, if, as I suspect, the real reason this monstrosity of a game is not only included in the Olympic pantheon but also televised relentlessly has to do with the supposed sex-appeal of the players, let’s include Jello-wrestling. Maybe mixed-doubles nude Jello-wrestling, even.

That ought to jack up the ratings, don’t you think, NBC?

Permalink 11 comments