Absolutely Inane Golf Commentary, A Question And A Plea, Fueled By Too Much Turkey

1. The USA proved the superiority of its socio-economic structure by riding seven consecutive birdies to a T7 placement in the World Cup of Golf this weekend. The USA leap-frogged Hugo Chavez’ Venezuelan team, who could only muster an even-par Sunday, 10 strokes behind the day of Team USA and one stroke in arrears after 72 holes.

2. Sibling rivalry took a back seat as the Brothers Molinari turned in a solid, unspectacular 68 on Sunday to defeat the Irish and the Swedes by one stroke. Edoardo and Francesco took advantage of teams that had no gas left in the metaphoric tank to win for Italia. Second-best comeback goes to England, whose -8 effort jumped Poulter and Fisher all the way to T4.

3. After leading all week, Ireland found a way to make three bogies, including one on a par five! Say what you will about Rory McIlroy, he’s more David Duval than Tiger Woods at this point in his career. He has yet to find a way to not lose.

4. Does a Cadillac Escalade come equipped with a black box?

5. Please take some time to reflect and to purchase a golf book from Bob Thomas today. This fine golf writer is recovering from a stroke and could use a little financial assistance. Trust me, the books will captivate you and the Thomases will be immensely grateful.