Golf @ Halloween: Things I Suspect

…the lunacy of some wag on a prominent USA golfing magazine’s website who questioned South Africa’s Lee-Anne Pace.  It seems that Pace, coming off a 2nd-place finish in a LPGA q-school sub-final event, indicated that she might not be around for the final q-school tournament, citing her current standing on the European Tour’s Order of Merit. “…can’t help but shake his head at Lee-Anne Pace’s logic” read the opening line, with name witheld to protect the buffoon. In case this particular gent rebuffs efforts by the world-wide web to be…world wide, here’s a bit of edification. Pace, a South Africaner, has no need to come to the USA for the LPGA; the LPGA will come to her. The struggles of the LPGA to secure stateside tournament sponsors will ultimately turn it into a participant in professional golf’s first viable world tour. The PGA Tour’s tours have dug in their heels and entertain nominal foreign participation. My guess is that the LPGA will hve two if not three foreign swings by 2015. By then, Mr. Wag Pundit, Pace might have won the 2011 Order of Merit, along with the spoils and exemptions it brings, and a few major championships to boot!

…The PGA Tour must have someone lined up to take the place of the Turning Stone Championship in August. The TSC abandoned its slot opposite the WGC-Bridgeston Classic, preferring no tournament to a diluted one. The Oneida Nation doesn’t need an event of that magnitude to cement its position; it can selectively go after events that elevate its offerings. My suggestion:  move the LPGA Championship there after 2012 (it’s signed up in Rochester, NY…just up the road, for the next two years) and give it a three-year trial run.

…The Fall Series and the Nationwide Tour Championship outweigh the FedEx Cup (by a lot) and the Ryder Cup (by a little) for drama and importance this end-of-season. Nothing replaces true drama and keeping your card or jumping to the big tour are far more dramatic than anything the Tour could concoct under the label FedEx Cup. The Ryder Cup suffered from the weather and from the USA being defending champs. The delays brought on by moisture made television and web viewing goofy; many are the friends who awoke at 3 a.m. on various days for live ‘casts, only to be sent back toward slumber. With the USA as defender and Captain Cory playing the role of somnolent pacifist (was he ever truly awake?) it was hard to get excited, unless you were on site and from Indiana.

…My favorite quote for 2010, concerning South Korea’s landslide victory at the World Amateur Team women’s championship reads something like this:  “…coasts to victory in the … championship. In other news, the sun rises in the East and fish swim in the sea.” So droll, so hilarious…bravo.

…In the same report, the German coach is quoted as suggesting that Korea may have lost many players along the 30-year path toward dominance. Turns out the Asian country debuted its national golf system three decades ago, with professional and amateur success the result. Here are some thoughts for the German coach: first, waaahh. second, lost them to professional ranks, maybe. third, where is your proof? Are there golf school dropouts in the streets of Seoul, begging for tees?

…sometimes a certain piece shouldn’t see the light of day, no matter what the reputation of the writer be. Stories on underachievers, for example…why kick someone when he/she is down?  One of the biggies currently has one out…common thread is debauchery and baccianale. 4 of the 5 are party animals, and the 5th (Weiskopf) comes off as such a grump that no one would want to party with him.  Also fitting into the “back in the drawer” category are pieces on who might be hot and who might be not. Although these stories mirror our current-day, insatiable compulsion for what is fresh (sometimes unripe!) they have little traction and can be dismissed as worthless filler, which leads me to…

…Matteo Manassero. He’s 17 and he won on tour. Yay. The  Knack had a hit with “My Sharona.” Yay. A star is not yet born. A fashion plate? Please! He’s Italian and a golfer…of course he’s a peacock. Historic triumph? How so? Certainly not the youngest. Stop annointing just so you might one day say “I annointed him.” Religious figures don’t come forth and claim “I baptized her/him and look where she/he is today!” Take a page, wags.