Slim chance for a pudgy Phil Mickelson Masters repeat

I have to agree with my younger and less insightful colleague, Chris Baldwin, though I usually disagree with him on more complicated matters, which tend to confuse him. This one is easy, though: I don’t see Phil Mickelson repeating at The Masters either, especially if it’s close, as the tournament is likely to be.

There seems to be this national subtext: we all want Lefty to win. He’s smiling all the time – why, I can’t say – and he’s got the soft, lumpy body of most weekend warrriors. He talks like us, he says “awesome,” and “cool,” all that stuff the previous, less imaginative generation says, like Baldwin. Mickelson can win, as long as it’s the Acme Podunk Riding Lawn Mower Invitational, but – let’s say it out loud once, for God’s sake! – he folds under pressure. He’s the American version of Greg Norman. The putt he made at 18 at Augusta last year was a fluke, I’m sorry to say. He simply doesn’t have the nerve to hold off a charging Tiger or Goose, much less the Big Easy or… hey, what is Vijay Singh’s stupid nickname anyway?

Anyway, Mickelson has a much better chance at Pinehurst and the U.S. Open later in the year, where the short game shall rule. He’ll finish top-10 at Augusta, cash his check, go home and be happy. He’ll be smiling, of course. Look, don’t get mad at me, I’d love to see the guy win – I just know he won’t.