Except for Michael Campbell, high hilarity at U.S. Open and Pinehurst No. 2
I’m not normally one of those sadists who enjoys seeing the PGA Tour pros tortured, especially by unfair golf courses. But, I have to admit I was braying like a donkey on Ecstasy during Sunday’s U.S. Open finale.
Maybe it’s because all of Pinehurst No. 2’s trickery is around the greens, but I loved seeing all those balls…trickle, trickle, trickle off the greens. “Will it hold? Will it stay? Oh, god there it goes!” The announcers acted like there may be a death in the family. Yow! There goes another one. It was like death by a thousand bee stings.
I’ve played those greens, I know what they were going through. I have to say, I was laughing as hard when I was doing the same thing this past year at No. 2, but then I’m incredibly secure in my manhood.
I didn’t enjoy seeing Retief Goosen implode, or the fat guy, but I LOVED seeing Michael Campbell mop up the floor with Tiger Woods. Woods is so intense, with that arrogant glare and that cursing after misses, and it was a joy to see this journeyman from New Zealand, this Maori warrior, make history with an incredible round. With a Tiger on his tail, Campbell just got better and better. Nerves of steel, heart of gold, soul on fire. He’s got the spirituality of a shaman, while Tiger is all talent and not much else. How do you say “choke” in Maori?
This was a championship by atttition – all the dominoes fell except for one.
I wonder if they’ll erect a statue to Campbell. Not likely. He ain’t American and he ain’t white. Too bad, he’s my new favorite.
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It was something to behold!
There are 3 variations for the word choke in Maori
1) Nanati (bananatee) leave off the BA in (pronounced )ba nanatee Physically choke
2)Rawa pronounced rahwah (smoke choke)
3)Kowaowao pronounced corewowwow (choke by weeds)
Whichever context you choose Michael didn't. Kia kaha
You're a journalist.
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