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Slowly, very slowly, Ben Crane wins US Bank Championship

Monday July 25, 2005 | 06:32:15 273 words, 2405 views
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If you’re a golfer and haven’t seen Ben Crane play yet, do yourself a favor – don’t. If you aren’t a golfer, do yourself a favor and watch him, either in person at a tournament or on television. It will either amuse and delight you or horrify you and and prevent you from taking up the game.

Crane, who won the US Bank Championship in Milwaukee this past weekend,
is best known for being a slow player. An excruciatingly slow player. He drove Rory Sabbatini off the deep end at the Booz Allen. Crane might as well be a 9-5 office worker, he’s put on the clock so much.

His setup is a thing to behold. You thought Sergio Garcia had a waggle? Crane takes it to a new level. I’ve seen less movement from Sherry Shake-It down at the the Crazy Horse topless bar. It’s hard to describe: it’s a series of tics and jumps and starts and stops and arcs and swoops and you name it. It makes me nervous just to watch him. “Tell me when he hits it,” I say, averting my eyes.

If you could harness the energy in Ben Crane’s setup, you could light Amsterdam for a week. It’s amazing after all he goes through, it ends up in a golf swing. I expected him to take off, like the Space Shuttle Columbia.

Golf shouldn’t cause a human to make those kind of movements. It’s like all the doubt and misery and injustice the game is responsible for is there in Ben Crane’s setup. He’s like a performance artist. I can see why Sabattini was nearly driven to despair.

Comments:

Comment from: Jonathan [Visitor]
Ben Crane: is it over yet? I had several anxiety attacks watching Golf this weekend. I had to look away from the TV screen every time he appeared only to look back before he was finished the nightmare-ish epic. This win can only be a fluke, his putting won this while others were having difficulties, in my opinion. Butch H. tell him to stop this madness so I can return to my relaxing weekend golf viewing. Please !
Permalink 07/26/05 @ 11:12
Comment from: Rob [Visitor]
A t.v disaster .
With the Ryder Cup just over a year away anyone fancy putting a team together to take some half decent golfers from accross the pond (U.K BASED)
We are all between 32 and 42 and hdcaps range from 4 to 16 (4 single figures and 4 from 12-16 )

Rob
Permalink 07/27/05 @ 05:46
Comment from: David [Visitor]
I agree the slow play is tough to watch, I suggest Tivo that way you can speed it up just a bit. However, you don't even mention that he is working on this and trying to improve. It is not as if he is saying, "yeah, sowhat? Deal with it. I doing better in all areas of the game every year that I am a pro." In regards to Rori Sabattini he is the opposite of Ben (ie: one of the fastest players on tour). Which can also have its disadvantages. I would not call Ben Crane a fluke when he can stare in the face of what he had to deal with at the Booz Allen with Rori and still charge for second making a plus 50 foot putt on 18. Any golfer worth his wedge knows you drive for show and putt for dough. That is exactly what Ben Crane is doing. Maybe Rori was more upset by his inability to beat Ben in that round and not the slow play. Anyone ever discuss that?
Permalink 07/30/05 @ 08:41

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