Great golf pairings at the Alfred Dunhill Links , and Madam Elton John

wow...can't wait to see what sort of sh*tstorm THIS post creates! Golly Tim, ya bashed kids, politicians, gays, and women in less than 250 words! You're a master! ;)

You sound like a real idiot.
"madam Elton John"
Because the man is gay?

Good god man, if gays can't take a little ribbing, what hope is there in the world?

Can we not share and celebrate our human differences? Isn't this that makes our world such an interesting, vital place in which to live and love?

Can we not speak to each other freely, and not be prisoners in those dark places where only the deadly serious dwell?

Elton is probably more butch than you'll ever be.

Excuse me, that's DAME Elton to you.

You've got to be kidding... is that what you consider humour? Head back to the cave buddy!

Richard, that's an insult to cavemen. :oD

He's just spent too much time at the 19th hole.

Tim, the problem is that you don't seem to have any respect at all towards Elton John (and many other people seem to have the same problem too)... you know very well that he is a big musician and certainly deserves respect because of his great work he has made throughout the years, despite what you think about him and his music.

Yeah, I like "Dame Elton" better.

For god's sake, he's a pop star with middling talent. I'm a semi-fan, he's done a handful of songs I like, nothing in the past 10 years.

It isn't like he's Tchaikovski.

And he once dressed in a big, pink bunny suit, or something like that. Plus, he's friends with Cher. And he wears a wig.

This guy deserves to be knighted?

Why not "Sir Dame Edna?"

Tim, the guy has raised $150 million for AIDS programs. That's not even counting other charities that he's donated time or money to.
He's also a spokesperson for Amnesty International.
ejaf.org

If you dumped all the pop star/spokespeople together in a big duffel bag, you know what you'd have?

A big bag full of cheap publicity.

It doesn't change the fact he's a mediocre talent. Now, he may be a good-hearted, well-intentioned, mediocre talent, but there it is.

I've dealt with Amnesty International in my time as a foreign correspodent. Never saw any spokespeople, just a bunch of hard-working people in the trenches, while Dame Elton is prancing around in a bunny costume.

As long as knighthoods aren't going to be about running people through with lances, anymore, Elton John should be at the top of the list. Listen to the albums and not just a handful of lighter hits, and it becomes clear that he's a f'ing genius.

I agree with Richard... it wasn't even clever, it's just name-calling, not good-natured ribbing. At least make your slurs funny.

"Magnus Greel"

Now that IS funny.

"It doesn't change the fact he's a mediocre talent"
You don't even have a clue about talent. The respect of Elton's peers should bring up to speed. Bon Jovi said it was actually frightening how talented Elton is while Lennon and McCartney have also made claims of the same spirit of that.

BTW- Elton does not publicize the fact that he goes to africa and other places to help out in person, using his own hands and time.
That is one of the things that seperates Elton John from the Oprah's of the world.

Now I'm going to get an earful
from Oprah's fans.
Thanks Tim.

Anyone who has seen Elton live, where he plays and sings for 2 1/2 or 3 hours each night
will be convinced that he is anything but
mediocre. Elton's albums of this century
rival his best work of the 1970's, thirty
years previous (listen to The Captain and the Kid and you will see what I mean).

People have been telling "Elton is gay"
jokes for 30 years, while 1 out of 10 of
their friends have squirmed because of the
bigotry directed to them.

Elton in a bunny suit is funny. Reporting
in your article that Elton John is
actually gay is just not that funny. Just
a mediocre attempt at wit. Maybe the author
should try to develop his piano playing
talents, since he is obviously a hack of a writer.

Wait a minute. Hold on just a darn second!

"Madam Elton" is funny, damn it.

"Dame Elton" is even funnier.

I wasn't exactly "reporting" that Elton John is gay, you nimrod.

People have known that for years.

"Elton John in a bunny suit is funny."

Well, now I know what your sense of humor leans toward. I bet you think those car salesmen in big, rabbit suits are a scream.

The word "infantile" springs to mind.

I'm betting you watch a lot of Saturday morning cartoons.

And anyone who thinks Elton John is a genius is a blind, pathetic product of this shallow, pop culture that mediocre celebrity-worshippers gobble up like bon-bons.

"And anyone who thinks Elton John is a genius is a blind, pathetic product of this shallow, pop culture that mediocre celebrity-worshippers gobble up like bon-bons."

And what is your idea of genius Timbo? Britney Spears? Jessica Simpson?

Hey Tim.

Are you enjoying your 6 minutes of fame? You have finally written an article that hasn't just gone straight to the trash heap, but has curiously awakened utter repulsion at your ideas. I bet you can't wait until your next article, so you can go back to being ignored in a tiny little corner of webspace. Why don't you lay off on your faithful readers, instead of accusing them of being so infantile that they actually spend time reading your stuff.

Hack.

Tim is just angry because I told him why Dame Elton is a Sir & he's got nothing to fall back on but "well I still think he's a mediocre talent!". :oD

BTW golf isn't really a sport.

Reg, not bad, but it's "15 minutes of fame." That comes from Andy Warhol, by the way. If you're going to use a lame cliche, at least get it right.

And Hollycat, if you think golf isn't a sport, I suggest you read this excellent treatise on why it IS a sport. You will get an idea of what true, writing talent is.

http://www.travelgolf.com/departments/clubhouse/golf-sport-dispute-631.htm

Bwahahaa...Reg was implying that you weren't worthy of even 15 minutes.

Golf is not a sport. It's outdoor pocket billiards. And if you think billiards is a sport, you're loonier than I thought.

Reginald can't speak for himself? What are you, his "spokesperson?"

You sound like one of those spin doctors for politicians who are always putting their feet in their mouths.

So, I guess you're "implying" Tiger Woods isn't an athlete?

I'm guessing you're one of those uncoordinated spazzes who's never played ANY kind of sport.

"It doesn't change the fact he's a mediocre talent. Now, he may be a good-hearted, well-intentioned, mediocre talent, but there it is."

"And anyone who thinks Elton John is a genius is a blind, pathetic product of this shallow, pop culture that mediocre celebrity-worshippers gobble up like bon-bons."

Seems like you got no ears because you post these kind of comments about Elton... that's bad for understanding his work.

"I suggest you read this excellent treatise on why it IS a sport. You will get an idea of what true, writing talent is."

This comment almost made me laugh hard... what do you think YOU know about talent? Judging by your comments, probably very little.

In addition to that what Elton has made in music world, he is also the most charitable musician in the world after Bono from U2.

"I'm a semi-fan, he's done a handful of songs I like, nothing in the past 10 years."

This comment even surprised me a little that you even like at least some of his songs... but I don't understand your opinion that he has done "nothing" in past 10 years... all his previous three albums have received very good critics (at least 4 stars out of 5 in most reviews). Billy Elliot was also a succesful musical although Lestat failed.

I got ears, baby. I am a huge fan of good music.

Where I differ from you is that I am a DISCERNING listener. You worship the celebrity, not the music. Elton John could come out with a CD of nothing but yodeling and you'd sing its praises.

You are one of those people who let others, especially critics, tell you what you like and don't like.

You have no opinion. Your tastes are force-fed to you.

"I am a huge fan of good music."

What music? I want examples.

"Where I differ from you is that I am a DISCERNING listener. You worship the celebrity, not the music. Elton John could come out with a CD of nothing but yodeling and you'd sing its praises."

Of course Elton has made bad albums like Victim of Love (which actually didn't even have any songs composed by himself), but those days have passed a long, long time ago. Nobody is perfect, after all.

Should I start to count here all the greatest songs Elton has made or why are you blaming me a person who just respects celebrity but not talent? If you blame me about that, then you also blame everyone else who listens Elton, or anyone else great musician.

You're a hopeless case, I can see it already pretty clearly.

Dylan, Robert Earl Keene, U2, Townes Van Zant, Bill Morrisey, Mark Knopfler, just to name a few.

I just got finishing listening to "All the Road Running," by Knopfler and Emmy Lou Harris, and "Sailing to Philadelphia by Knopfler and James Taylor.

This is music, my friend.

Not pap pop.

Hillbilly music that takes itself too seriously!

But what did I expect from someone who taps a little ball around a manicured lawn and calls it sport.

Calling Robert Earle Keene, Townes Van Zant et all "hillbilly music" tells me all I need to know about you.

This, from somebody who thinks Elton John, for god's sake, is profound.

He can't even be mentioned in the same breath, in either lyrics or music, with any of the artists I mentioned.

You are no longer to be taken seriously. Actually, you never were. Please stop commenting, as you are further embarrassing yourself.

You do not meet minimum intellectual standards for this blog.

Anyways, despite what you think about Elton's music you should start to respect him... As I posted before, he is the number one charitable musician in the world, and that is a really big thing. It's just really rude and stupid to make stupid jokes about him, because you know that he is a good person who does a lot good. Many people are just too stupid to understand it, and you're a basic example.

I hope that at least you'd get some day enough wise to respect him, and throw that carelessness attitude away, because carelessness is the biggest problem in the world.

And remember that Elton is a rock musician, not "pap pop".

Case closed.

I enjoy pushing people's buttons, and some are easier than others. :-)

Of course, it's usually in response to bloggers who don't know that the female equivalent of Sir is Dame.

You're good, Hollycat.

You are hereby authorized to continue comments, though be aware you remain on probationary status.

FYI, who the hell cares what the female equivalent of "Sir" is? It's one of those silly British traditions the rest of the world laughs at and we don't care about.

FACT: Elton John has had a Top 40 hit every year for 30 consecutive years, a record even Elvis couldn't beat.

FACT: Elton John has received the following important honors, besides being knighted: Polar Music Prize from the King of Sweden, Officer of Arts and Letters from the government of France, and a Kennedy Center Honor from the US of A for a lifetime of achievement in the performing arts.

They don't give out awards like that for pap-mongering.

This is how you judge musical integrity? Top-40 hits?

Why is this blog attracting such shallow people? It couldn't be me because I'm a very deep and soulful man.

Yeah, the King of Sweden is a well-known music expert.

France likes Elton John because he eats most of their food.

And yes, they DO give out awards like that for pap-mongering.

I think Liberace got one.

Timmy, I think you should just leave music rating because you just don't know anything about it.

In all of those posts about Elton's music you've said actually only one thing which is true:

"He can't even be mentioned in the same breath, in either lyrics or music, with any of the artists I mentioned."

... because he is better than all of them :P

Great Americans, I have decided, shall be called Patriot, as in Patriot Tim. Pat for short, which conveniently can be used for either male or female honorees. Since this is an informal country, the honor shall be bestowed at Disneyland by the 1,000th visitor that day. Said visitor will drape a plastic dollar-sign lanyard, likely made in China, over the neck of the honored Pat. They will be required to sign a waiver in case they accidentally strangle themselves with it, while on board the Mad Tea Party. Dinner will be a barbecue in Frontierland. Weapons must be checked at the door. The Lion King will be shown for the children, but Can You Feel the Love Tonight was deemed too suggestive and will be bleeped out. Festivities will wrap up promptly at 21:00 to accommodate early tee times the next day

Oh yeah, Elton's a gifted lyricist.

Did he write this or just sing it?

"Well, it's Saturday night and I wanna fight
Wanna get a belly-full of beer."

Yeah man, that's pure genius.

Hollycat,

Very good, you're off probation, but I believe that's George Bush's side of the country you're referring to.

And that 1,000th visitor to Disneyworld you refer to is likely to be European, quite possibly British.

I've been there before, I'm ashamed to say, and the place was flooded with Euro-trash. I see them here on the golf course all the time. They're like stray dogs.

You sound like one of those spin doctors for politicians who are always putting their feet in their mouths

Dear writer:

Please return to your 5th grade grammar teacher, because you must have missed that day when they told everybody that "one" is a singular pronoun, so you need to say his or her rather than "their."

Maybe grammar is the least of your worries, though. Did you happen to notice that nobody seems to appreciate your remarks, and throwing more insults doesn't seem to help your case?

You don't even know the fact that Bernie Taupin has written most of the lyrics for Elton... there are only a few lyrics written by himself, and here is one:

"Holy Moses, let us live in peace, let us strive to find a way to make all hatred cease, there's a man over there what's his colour I don't care... he's my brother, let us live in peace."

Now that's one of the most beautiful and wisest lyrics I've ever heard.

And about "Saturday Night's Alright"... that's the hardest-rocking song ever made, and Nickelback's cover version just proves it. You're right that it's pure genius, and the lyrics (which aren't even correct in your post btw) are perfect rock lyrics written by Bernie Taupin.

Elton Wannabe, blogs are meant to be informal means of communication and, as such, one doesn't always pay as much attention to grammar or even spelling as one would in formal communication.

That's why I rarely point out errors in grammar, syntax or spelling by my many readers, unless it's obvious and I want to humiliate them.

As for you, Fat-Lip, the lyrics you cited...

"Holy Moses, let us live in peace, let us strive to find a way to make all hatred cease, there's a man over there what's his colour I don't care... he's my brother, let us live in peace."

...could have been written by a simpleton. They, in fact, WERE written by a simpleton.

The sentiment has been said many times, by much better lyricists, and in much more eloquent terms. These are sixth-grade lyrics.

I suggest you listen to seriously creative lyrics, written by real artists, some of them written by some of the artists I named above.

Get out of this pop culture rut you seem to be stuck in. There's a much more erudite world out there.

"As for you, Fat-Lip, the lyrics you cited..."

I'm not actually fat, I'm a thin guy, but you must be really fat because of your surname (a relative to MacDonald siblings?!). Stop eating hamburgers and listen to Elton.

And, all the people who've posted in this thread agree with me that those lyrics are great lyrics and definitely 6th grade lyrics...

You got something sick against pop music as well... it's the same disease what jazz guys have against rock music. It's YOU who should have to get out of that narrow-minded world you're living in.

You don't even have true facts to represent in your posts anymore, so this discussion is getting useless.

I think you're also in a completely wrong place to post just endless insults towards other people who want share opinions... which is one of the reasons why I've continued this so far. You also told earlier in your post that there should be a freedom of speech in here. But what's the use of it if someone like you has nothing but trash to talk?

The other reason is that I HATE those people who make stupid jokes about sexual minorities especially in public, which is in fact same kind of thing like racism. It's also very insulting towards those minorities themselves. It will take some time before people get wiser and start to accept different people - unfortunately it will yet take long time. But some day, they will be accepted like everyone else and attitudes like yours will disappear.

The Madame Elton comment was no big deal, I took no offense as this would be the type of joke Elton would tell on himself, I do have a problem with you referring to his music as "mediocre". I doubt you have ever heard "Tumbleweed Connection" or "Madman Across The Water", not to mention his latest masterpiece "The Captain and The Kid". Yes, Elton John is a gifted musician, whether you think so or not. Any of your favorite musicians would surely agree if asked. In fact, "Dylan digs Elton". Google it.
It seems your taste in music is decent but rather limited. Maybe it's best you skip the music commentary and stick to golf.

Elton Wannabe,

Actually, now that I've gone back and looked at what I wrote, you're wrong, Mr. Grammar.

"You sound like one of those spin doctors for politicians who are always putting their feet in their mouths."

"...for politicians who are always..." is a conjoining, prepositional phrase, and therefore takes precendence over the preceding prepositional phrase.

"Politicians," is plural, therefore, takes a plural verb and qualifier.

Unless you're the kind who would say "Elton are an idiot."

Which you very well may be.

Jacob, I've listened to the first two you mentioned. Both were OK, with a couple of very good songs, but nothing special.

There are literally hundreds, perhaps thousands, of musicians far more talented than Elton John.

Also, it makes no difference to me how many people here disagree. Real music aficianadoes probably saw the name "Elton John" and sighed a collective yawn.

Most of you, maybe all, are programmed to spout superlatives about mediocre celebrities because you watch too much "Entertainment Tonight!"

HAHAHAHAHA

You are kidding, right?

"One of those spin doctors for politicians--" Are you trying to tell me that you were talking about the politicians, rather than one of those spin doctors?!?!

Yeah, right.

Back to the resaerch books to look that up, for you mister speling champ.

"Jacob, I've listened to the first two you mentioned. Both were OK, with a couple of very good songs, but nothing special."

Well isn't it making them already special that they've a couple of very good songs? And if you haven't listened his three previous albums, it's quite stupid to say that Elton has done nothing in the past ten years.

"There are literally hundreds, perhaps thousands, of musicians far more talented than Elton John."

One of your problems is, that you're concentrating all of your attention towards lyrics... Elton isn't a master of lyrics, he is a master of melody like Mozart was. I know that there are literally hundreds, perhaps thousands, of musicians far more talented than Elton John (finally at least one fact in your posts...). But Elton doesn't need skills to make lyrics because Bernie makes them.

The only composers I might place to the same level in melody making are some classical composers like Mozart and Beethoven, and then maybe Lennon/McCartney, but that's it.

Music is a lot more than just lyrics - all classical music except opera don't have lyrics, and still a lot of people listens them. If you like lyrics so much, then why don't you go to read poetry?

You...are...kidding....me.

You're comparing Elton John to Mozart and Beethoven?

Lip, you seem like a nice, earnest person. I urgently ask you to seek counseling from a qualified expert.

"I urgently ask you to seek counseling from a qualified expert."

Who you definitely aren't. You're just a listener who thinks that any song with good lyrics are great... you don't understand nothing about melody.

If Elton John can't be compared with Mozart or Beethoven (who are classical composers), then at least with guys like John Lennon and McCartney.

Elton is not only a master of melody, but also a master of many genres. Elton has made succesful rock songs, ballads, country songs, pop songs, R&B and a lot more. That's why only The Beatles can be compared with him, because they were also able to create good music in many genres.

Those artists you've mentioned, like Dylan and U2 are only in one genre, which really drops their points. Surely Dylan has done great folk music, but that's it! Where are the rockers and uptempo songs? No talent to make them.

If you think we can't compare modern composers like Elton to classical composers, then you got really vague picture about talent.

You've never heard Dylan rock?!

Robert Earl Keene lyric:

"I am guilty of
a dreadful, selfish crime.
I have robbed myself
of all my precious time."

No, I have never heard Dylan rock cause he doesn't really rock, and if does, then really little. And that's folk rock anyways.

Now what would be a Dylan's real great rocker? Like A Rolling Stone? Blowing In The Wind? Just Like A Woman?

Its sad when a so called Critic is making fun of and arguing with people he doesnt even know. makes you a great critic, NOT!
I just saw EJ last night in Columbia,MO and he played for almost 3 hours straight non stop.

He is a great perfomer. if you want to read EJ lyrics go to www.eltonography.com. he has some powerful lyrics.

Haha... so, you "cool" guy don't like to listen to Elton cuz his not "cool"?

I warn you. Don't be a fan of Timmy, or you'll get dangerous influences from him... It's better to be independent and choose by yourself the music you want to listen to, not the others. That's much cooler in my opinion...

Springsteen is also a talented musician, but even he doesn't rock as hard as Elton does. Born In The USA might sound cool rocking but it isn't enough aggressive to beat rockers like Saturday Night or The Bitch Is Back, which are both absolutely superior against any Springsteens rockers.

Amanda, these lyrics you listed are all very adolescent. They could have been written by a high school, literary class.

You can try to tell me Elton John knows melody, but don't, for god's sake, try to sell him as a lyricist.

Hey Timbo- Amanda isn't trying to sell EJ as a lyricist. As you should be able to clearly see at the top of each song it says "Lyrics by Bernie Taupin"! That obviously means Elton didn't write the lyrics! And by the way, those lyrics WERE written by a VERY young Bernie Taupin. Timbo is such a stupid, stupid man!

"Timbo is such a stupid, stupid man" has a certain rhythym to it. I'd like to hear Elton John write music for it.

Anyway, I'm wondering, Michelle, why did you decide to refer to me as "Timbo?"

When people are mad at me, they always call me "Timmy" or "Timbo."

I wasn't trying to sell EJ as a lyricist. DUH, It clearly states Bernie Taupin as lyricist. He was probably no older than 20 years old when he wrote many of his songs maybe even not older than 25. He started writting songs when he was very young.

Hey, what happened to CoolGuy's comments? You deleted your only defender? (or should I say Madam CoolGuy-- hardee har har)

I don't know what happened to Cool Guy. I was looking for his comments the other day, too.

I rarely delete anything. But, there are other monitors creeping around here.

Looks like someone also deleted Amanda's lyrics.

Tim, in context of the theme of the article, your comments about Elton are inappropriate and unwarranted. I get it. He’s gay so therefore Madame or Dame. Very clever. As a straight man, I don't understand why the biggest gay bashers are gay themselves, given all the horrible prejudice they face. I’m sure Elton has faced his share, and probably handled it extreme courage.
Tim, why do you think it's appropriate do make references to Elton's private life here?
Just because Elton has always used self deprecating humor, I don’t think it’s neither right nor brave to join in and bash him behind his back. Once I’d like to see someone say this to his face, on public record, with Elton ready to answer.
Next, what makes Elton a genius is how he combines notes to create powerful haunting melodies, even evident in his so-called worst "pap". “Funeral for a Friend”, not a single, always scores at the top of greatest rock anthems, year after year, here in New York. Combine this with his ability to treat the piano as a percussion instrument, as it should be, his vocal style and you have one of the greatest artists of all time.
Tim, I do however, appreciate your taking the time out to answer these comments as well as having the courage of your convictions.