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Golf Santee, Dysfunctional Strippers and Marie

Wednesday April 20, 2005 | 12:25:30 334 words, 3292 views
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Wow. I am learning that the golfers of Santee, South Carolina love their strippers more than The Rebel loves crushing a drive down the middle of the fairway.

You guys have been bitch slapping me like crazy. Cheap golf and cheap strippers go together like Pabst Blue Ribbon and a table dance.

I think it is time for the Santee Tourism Department to hire me to do their
marketing. I would be a star. I could see it now. “Luck, Ladies and
Lysol"….Play Santee and catch no Fleas!”

Damn, I am good at this. Robert Wooten and his five clients have nothing on me.

How about…."Play Santee, have a dysfunctional stripper named Marie sleep with me….”

I have an even better suggestion. The Santee Tourism Bureau should come up
with a real cool game to promote the “finer side” of their city in conjunction with the golf. How about placing Marie, Mariah, Snow, Mercedes and all of the other Spinners babes on a stage and play the game, “How many illegits does your favorite stripper have?”

And the winner….drum roll……..gets a free vacation for two (without
your wife) to play “the best of Santee.” Grab your cheap irons and live it up
with you, a stripper and a flea collar.

Ahhh, forgive me. The thought of ending a round of golf, getting a lap dance from woman with a stage name while counting her stretch marks causes me to get mushy.

Thanks to Santee Marketing Genius Robert Wooten, The Rebel is alive! I am feeling the
creative genius of a being a hi-fi ad exec. Who would have thought The Rebel as a marketing genius? I am headed to Wooten’s trailer right now to have some Pabst and Stohs beer and talk shop.

I think it is time we all jump on the bandwagon to have The Rebel assist the fine city of Santee and Spinners Gentleman’s Club with a creative marketing campaign.

I am tanned, rested and ready!

Rebel


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