FROM THE ROUGH

Thanks for strategic par-4s, Miller; No thanks for Woods, Casey

(Nov. 30, 2004) - An only slightly belated Thanksgiving column:

Thanks for short, strategic par-4s. A par-4 doesn't have to be long and hazard-harried. Just give me some options and make me think a little. Throw in a dogleg I think I can cut, but rarely can.

No thanks for long, boring par-5s. Length isn't everything, in golf and other special activities.

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On the other hand, thanks for long golf courses with wide fairways where you can whip out your driver at every hole. I paid good money for the damn thing, now let the big dog eat!

No thanks for all those courses that crow about "game management." Just be honest: the developer told the architect he had to make room for all those houses that blight the landscape. Your course is too short!

Thanks for Johnny Miller, the Charles Barkley of golf.

No thanks for most other golf commentators who are bland as a bad resort course.

Thanks for Colin Montgomery. There's just something about the guy I like.

No thanks for Paul Casey, the English twit who said Americans were "stupid," "annoying," "infuriating" and didn't know what the hell was going on most of the time.

He also criticized Tom Lehman as the 2006 U.S. Ryder Cup captain because of his part in the 1999 U.S. celebration at the Ryder Cup in Brookline, Mass.

Will these people EVER get over that? They should be thankful there wasn't a riot, which, being European, they should be familiar with.

This from a guy who played at Arizona State, lives in Scottsdale, has an American girlfriend and presumably eats hamburgers and french fries.

Thanks for Titlest, who dumped Casey. And thanks in advance for all those American fans who - despite their ignorance - will let Casey know how they feel about his hypocrisy on next year's PGA Tour, where Casey will be making scads of annoying U.S. money.

Thanks for long, forced carries.

No thanks for ridiculous rough where finding wayward balls is hopeless. Ever wonder if these guys are in cahoots with golf ball manufacturers?

Thanks for the "silly season." It's a nice break from all that stroke play.

No thanks for The Skins Game. They've sold their soul to sell real estate. Will they ever play an interesting course again?

Thanks to ABC for generally good coverage of the Skins.

No thanks to ABC for leaving out the dramatics of the 18th hole finish which forced the playoff.

Thanks for organizations like Pellucid that don't follow the party line and who tell us the truth about the real state of golf.

No thanks for those entrenched organizations like The National Golf Foundation that tell us how great the game is going despite numbers to the contrary. If the game is to grow, it must first be honest with itself.

Thanks for those people like Ray Finch, owner of Emerald Dunes in West Palm Beach, who actually do something to help junior golfers.

No thanks for all those people who SAY they want to help juniors get into the game, but never do anything about it.

Thanks for Vijay Singh, the quiet champion.

No thanks for Tiger Woods. Is anyone else getting tired of those short, smirking, purposely enigmatic answers he gives at interviews? It didn't seem to be so annoying when he was on top of the world.

While we're at it, no thanks for all those Americans who skipped the World Cup, and that includes Woods, Phil Mickelson, Davis Love, David Toms, Chad Campbell, Jim Furyk, Kenny Perry, Stewart Cink and Chris DiMarco.

Of course, the World Cup has also devolved into another real estate selling vehicle, but I don't think these guys were thinking about that when they chose not to represent their country.

Thanks for golf instructors who keep it simple, and let you learn on your own.

No thanks for golf instructors who insist the only way you can get better is to shell out hundreds of dollars for technical instruction you can't understand.

Thanks for Annika Sorenstam. Though she was clearly overmatched in the Skins, she never let up.

No thanks for the U.S. Ryder Cup team. Enough's been said. They choked.

No thanks for all those golf travel writers who swear every course they review is excellent and "a challenge for all levels."

Thanks for the few travel golf writers and online golf networks who maintain their objectivity. Hey, I wasn't thinking about anyone in particular.

Any opinions expressed above are those of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the management. The information in this story was accurate at the time of publication. All contact information, directions and prices should be confirmed directly with the golf course or resort before making reservations and/or travel plans.