Injuries to Mickelson and Wie prove that golf is a savage contest for gladiators
Last week's tour action reinforced what we golfers have long known: Our game is an ancient, barbaric quest riddled with savagery and physical abuse.
Phil Mickelson, Michelle Wie and Masters champ Zach Johnson were all knocked out of action before the end of the first round. Mickelson suffered a wrist injury in the Memorial, while Johnson couldn't overcome strep throat and was forced to withdraw before completing as well.
At the Ginn Tribute Hosted by Annika in Mount Pleasant, S.C., Michelle Wie heroically struggled through 16 holes despite a "wrist tweak," but couldn't muster up the pride to stand by a final score around 90.
These weren't the only souls struck by golf's menacing hand. During a round last week, my mobile phone vibrated during my backswing, disrupting my tempo and I hit the ball chunky and a piece of turf went straight up my nose.
A round of golf is about as safe as a $5 all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. All of you weekend warriors know what I'm talking about: 14 sharp, steel weapons per gladiator sending little white missiles into the sky with little direction, and driving cars without seat belts on a field of more than 200 acres littered with wild, unpredictable squirrels pumped full of rabies.
And we must mention as well the dangers that lie in leaving your spouse with the kids in a dirty house for the afternoon.
Yet we trudge out to the course every week. There are streets in Beirut on which I'd feel more at ease.
With some divine intervention, hopefully the upcoming U.S. Open and LPGA Championship will see our competitors through four rounds of safe swinging.
And to the rest of you trudging out to face the links this week or any week: Godspeed.
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